This Is Me

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

Okay I’m done laughing. Chuckled.

No wait I’m not done.

LOLOLOLOLOL.

Okay.  I went to had get my hair cut. I asked for my fringe to be cut. I regret superbly. It’s horrible I’ve no idea how to go to school tomorrow. Sad super sad. I hate it alot.

Anyways, as usual i went to Watson’s to buy my facial cleanser. I usually use L’oreal Men!=x But it ran out of stock so I bought Neutrogena Men! 

And at the the men section of the Watson’s, i was there and so was this guy. He dressed office-liked. Shirt,long pants, leather shoes, brief case etc etc. And then…

HE WAS VIEWING THE CONDOM SECTION LOL.

At first i was like whatever. And then he picked up the biggest box of condom with the brand of Durex. He was carrying this basket. In the basket there was some tidbits.

LOL.

HE PICKED UP THE CONDOM AND PLACED IT IN HIS BASKET AND TRIED TO COVER IT WITH THE TIDBITS LOL.

I find it super duper hilarious. Yes, i’m pretty immature. But the though of singaporeans having sex makes me laugh. LOL. It’s just like… EEEUUU?

And i hate my hair a lot.

I found two haters. I don’t really care. Singaporeans i guess *shrug* Want their IP Address? But first, i will not be responsible to whatever you’re planning to do with it.

202.156.152.69

219.74.158.20

Must be Sherine Wong. LOLOLOL. Oops.

Make a nazri’s hate club. Please. That way, my blog will be publicize faster.

Anyways, i’m kinda pissed that the fact that Australia will be getting iPhone 3G ealier than Singapore. Why? Why why why damn it.

The network provider that will be selling the iPhone 3G in Australia is Optus. Optus is Singtel-owned. Singtel is suppose to sell the iPhone 3G in Singapore. And it doesn’t make sense why Australia is getting first compared to Singapore!

Quote from Wikipedia

SingTel Optus Pty Limited is the second largest telecommunications company in Australia, and is a wholly owned subsidiary of Singapore Telecommunications (ASX:SGT)

What does Australia have that Singapore don’t have! Other then more land. Singapore is perfectly technologically!

Ohh wait maybe the iPhone 3G has to undergo some test by the IDA or something.

I felt like smiling today

You know..

It doesn’t require much. A little a day is more than enough for now.

HERE IS THE FUCKING IRONY.

I don’t have time for this.

I was waiting for the Bus No. 5 at the bus stop somewhere around the SAFRA and i saw KarYee and Christina.

I didn’t really like had a chat with them because they went up of the double decker bus while i stayed down because i merely need to hang on for 2 stops. I should have gone up! Both of then are in TP. I saw Sophia the other day at TP’s Business Cafeteria. Amelia is in the child psychologist course. What about XinYi and MayChin?!

Christina reminds me of the times that i spent in the choir. I used to stand in the backrow with Christina, Shishan and Yiling i think. And we would like give our 110%? Really and we would try to sing loudly and christina is like great man! Motivational person! And we would always get drown by the other groups of ‘na na na’.

And KarYee! I remember secondary 2, she was a great artist and she always bring sweets to school! Ohh well time to move on. I get pretty emotional thinking about this but when i think about it again, who still does get emotional like this like me?

I bet everyone has move on and settle down into their new class in junior college, polytechnic or institute of technical education. I bet they’re having so much fun with their new classmates. 

I’m a pretty tensed up person. Every time i’m out of my comfort zone, i get so tensed up and i hate it. And i have no self confidence at all. Ohh wait, what am i suppose to be confident of? Nothing. I did something dumb today and i hate myself for doing it without thinking of the consequences. 

I don’t understand with the way people react. It is just odd and contradicts the observation that i’ve made.

Some time back then, somewhere around my birthday, i got a macbook as a gift. I was hyperventilating when i heard the doorbell and squeaked, ‘Ohh my macbook is here!’

Apple Inc has great service. My mum ordered the macbook for me in the afternoon and that night they delivered it.

BEHOLD THE MACBOOK!

“LET’S OPEN IT NOW”

*Sparkling Eyes*

What a beauty!

Darling! I will never let go of you!

And my brother said, not gonna thank your parents? I was like Ohh yea. forgot. >_>

Anyways, i demanded Apple’s Time Capsule after that. $400+! And it’s only 500GB. The 1TB cost like $700+ My macbook is $1800+

AND IT ARRIVED!

At first when i saw it, there was like some chinese characters on the frontbox and i was like ‘ What the fuck. Some china made fake apple product?’ I mean like China made so many fake stuff like the iPhone and the fake Egg i read on stomp.

Front!

Back!

‘Designed By Apple In California’

The Time Capsule!

Ignore the messy room.

AND AND AND.

I’m so getting the iPhone once it’s out. I’m gonna sell my Nokia N82 even though i’ve been a loyal nokia user ever since my first handphone! The one without colour! Ahh Yes Nokia 3315.

APPLE FANBOY!

Wait. I’m not done.

I’ve been looking around to trying to find some cheap skin for my macbook. The cheapest i saw was $20. The most expensive skin that i saw is $59. I’m tempted to get the cheap skin BUT BUT BUT.. Good things don’t come cheap and we all know that really. I’m sure the $20 is made from some cheap material and it is merely just to add some design to the macbook and thats all.

You know.. there is not free lunch in this world.

Anyways i found this garskin. Their price is about $49. The skin that they provide has 4 different types of resistance. Static, Sweat, Splash and Scratch resistance. And why that shouldn’t be worth $49? Does the $20 skin has those resistance? I don’t know. >_>

I found 3 skin that i like and i can’t made up my mind which i want.

Overgrowth is the name.

Gradient Overgrowth.

Blazing Out (Blue)

Aren’t they nice? Are they too feminine? I think I’m getting Overgrowth because it has a white background. My macbook is white so when i use overgrowth it will be like as if those design kinda grow suddenly. If i use the Gradient/Blazing Out, it will look pretty obvious that i stick some kind of sticker on it.

And today is fooyiling’s birthday

Happy birthday 17th girl!

Does this picture look feminine?-.-

Great day today for 2 great people i’ve known!

Happy 17th birthday to Syafiq and Kamelia!

Hope they’ll enjoy their day with their friends and family! And hopefully their wish will come true? Haha cliche man.

Super old photo. I had this photo made into a puzzle and gave it to Syafiq. And yes that is Syafiq and me back then when we were primary 6. I think it was on the last day of school and we decided to give other gifts to remember us incase we were posted to different secondary school.

He gave me a candle model of his hand! 

Ohh by the way, you know the line ‘ i need a psychotherapist ‘.  I received this comment.

Hi ,
I am a psychotherapist and what you are describing is what we professionals call “Projection” and alot of our training is to adopt the ability to offer a non- judgemental attitude to patients. What patients say about themselves and others does tell us alot about their attitudes and self perception.
Regards
Dawn Pugh

Http://www.dawnpugh.com

Ohh i’m so grown up now.

=/

Why don’t you take a second to think about the last time you made fun of someone. Probably not long ago. In fact, you may be making fun of me right now which is certainly within the realm of possibility. But anyway, i would suggest that when you make fun of someone it is actually illuminating something in yourself with which you yourself is uncomfortable. 

For an example, you might be making fun of someone for being ugly and i think that would probably mean that you yourself are insecure with the way that you look. Or you might make fun of someone a boy for an example for being feminine and that’s probably because you yourself are uncomfortable with your own femininity.

So when you make fun of someone you are really defining yourself and not that other person. And i said that before and i’ll it say it again right now. when you make fun of someone you’re defining not them but rather yourself. So you know when you make fun of someone you’re actually saying a lot about yourself and really nothing about the other person. I think that’s an important point that should be made.

And what does this has to do with loving yourself? Well, i think that when you love yourself, you don’t find the need to judge or make fun of other people. So you know do i think that anyone will be 100% not be able to judge anyone? No. I think thats probably not really possible for most of us. But! i think that all of us can bring awareness to those moments when we’re judging other people and say okay, I’m making a judgement here and this is saying a lot about myself and how i feel about myself.

And that itself is very illuminating, powerful and wonderful. So i think it also worth saying that it is easier to love yourself when you have a more complete understanding of yourself. I don’t think you need to know yourself 100% in order to love yourself. I don’t think it’s possible to know yourself 100%. I think that we spend most of our lives discovering who we are and i think that in many ways the best answer to the question of who am i? is probably to silence because word can’t really get at that truth.

But when we took moments to step into silence or to spend time keeping in with nature. If we turn off the radio, if we turn off the television, if we turn off the American Idol. If we turn those things off and step into some silence, i think it is a great way to discover who we are in a more complete way i suppose.

So how do you love yourself? Well, i think a great step is to bring awareness to those moments when you judge other people and i think you should make priority to schedule  alone time. And if all else fails, you can love yourself the old fashion way.

wickydkewl

Do i love myself? Well, in certain aspect, yes however, i’m still trying to be a better person.

“It doesn’t matter if you can afford non living things when you can’t share it with anyone.”

Who is actually materialistic? I used to think that I’m materialistic but not anymore. Even though i desire numerous items, they’re not really what i need. I kind of told someone what I’m experiencing. I doubt anyone can relate to it.

Anyways, heard of “Your eyes tell me the truth.” ?

Why don’t we use coloured contact lens and masked that up! While we’re at that, put up a facade as well!

World of lies.

“Here, a glimpse of what is harsh.”

Have you ever gossip with someone? Or talk bad things about someone?

While you’re gossiping, does it ever come to your mind that this person is capable of doing such things to you too? Why wouldn’t that person criticize about you behind your back? If he or she hates you that is. 

And off course the above wouldn’t bother you if you always gossip with your best friend.

There is a prevention to the above events. We can always just suck up to everyone and pretend to be nice and play your cards well. There might be just some idiots who will turn their cards against you.

Here comes another issue, hypocritical.

I think there is 2 types of hypocrites. Just like 2 types of lies. There is a white lie and the bad lie. Well, the first type of hypocrite in my opinion is that being nice and not being too straightforward and harsh. You know being hypocrite to be nice to someone. Pretty similar to white lie.

On the other hand, there is the nasty hypocrites. Like betraying your friends or breaking the trust.

If you like to gossip and then be a hypocrite and be nice to everyone.

If you don’t like to gossip then be nasty to everyone. 

Is being hypocritical always a bad thing?

Subjective indeed. Words coming out from a 17 year old.

Isn’t it better to be like me? Just shut up and drive listen. No it isn’t. Another issue will arise from that. Am i trying too hard to achieve perfection?

Sometimes, I’m scared to speak up because what if i said the wrong things and insult? In the past, every time when i said something, i usually get a negative reply. From that, I’m scared to speak up. Do i think too much? I wonder if i usually blog like an adult, mature or it sounds like coming out from a 10 year old kid.

Nazri Chuckled.

I really do need a psychotherapist.

***************

Today, Ms Chiang decided to gave us back all the term test marks, grades and our banding.

B for Communication Skills (CMSK)
A for Internet and Information System in Organizations (IISO)
A for Web Design (WDS)
A for Computer Architecture (CARC)
B for Problem Solving and Programming. (PRSP)
C for Computing Maths (CMATHS)
Top 20% out of the entire Diploma.

For PRSP, 1 MORE MARK AND I GOT my 4TH As. DAMN IT. CMaths. get it ? -C-Maths. And i got a C for it. I’m slacking on PRSP and CMATHS alot this few days. I don’t understand JAVA at all.

4th in class. i think.

I don’t understand with some people who goes totally emotional over unrequited love. 

It’s like just fucking move on and be happy bitches. You sit there like a pathetic dog and whine about it all the fucking time. Like as if anything is going to happen if you did that.

I think that this nature of sadness is pretty much FAKE. People are just melancholy because they are unable to get the things that they desire. If they don’t desire it, wouldn’t they be much more euphoric. It’s like compare the sadness of your family member being dead to unrequited love. It’s different…

That pretty much contradicts what I’m facing. And no I’m not emoing over unrequited love.

I was pretty much melancholy yesterday. But i don’t really show it or cry all of a sudden to attract unnecessary attention.

It’s just something that..

And it pretty much annoys me when i see people being gloomy. It’s like..

DO YOU FEEL WHAT I FEEL? (Be melodramatic here)

No, and i doubt anyone will. It’s pretty difficult to relate.

And off course whatever i typed is totally subjective and i don’t know if it even make sense in the first place. It’s 1:17 am and 37 seconds. I better get started on my Part 2 of the IISO Assignment.

Procrastination lurks in me.

Quintessence of …

Let’s face it Nazri. It’s the 21st century. Time has change. Who are you trying to lie? You’re lying to no one but yourself Nazri.

IT’S ALL FACADE. IT’S ALL LIES.

I need a psychotherapist.